The Trials and Tribulations of one Nick Collicutt

BLAH

2006-07-07T22:34:00.000-04:00

Oh, the blog. I seem to have forgotten about it.

It seems that I always post when I'm in a really bad mood and today is no exception.

The summer is the summer, lots of work and work. At least I can spend some time outside when I can. The next stop is to start playing more and more tennis, just a matter of finding mor partners to play with. Let's just hope the shoulder holds up a little longer before it falls off finally. I guess I should get it checked out soon.

Fuck this....im too pissy to write any more

-NICK

Grumble...Mumble.....Banana

2006-02-28T22:07:00.000-05:00

Howdy Howdy,

Hell is coming....

Who am I kidding, it's here already!!! Sometimes I wonder why school has to be such a pain in the ass....I mean by the time we get out, we will have lost so many years of our lives because of stress that our future employers will get less productive years from us. How can this be good???

Maybe I'm just bitter after having such a kickass week off....and now I'm back to waking up at 6am, to drag myself to the Neurological Institute for 8:30 am .....I came to enjoy my bed, and now I can't.

Looks like I'm back at the good ol' BGC this summer...I'm sure it will be a great time again, I just hope that people will come back and work, or if not just come and visit me...I get lonely.

I'll go do more studying now...it seems that's the only thing I do, besides sleep, shower and sit in class....wow....

Current msuic: "Somethin's Goin' On In My Room" - Colin James and the Little Big Band II

Person to die: The person who invented CRAZY STRAWS....they're just way to trippy for their own good

- Le NICK

My Head is Itchy

2006-02-14T11:48:00.000-05:00

Holy Fuck...Ihave not been here in a long. long time.

Ok, the update on my life since last November, or whenever I wrote last:

NOTHING. Nothing is really new, same old pain the ass school, same ol' coaching....but no more bartending for the time being....so this means that I have more freetime to do absolutely nothing with!!! SWEET SASSY MOLASSY!!!!!!!!!

I did consider writing a few days ago...when it was raining...in the middle of FUCKING FEBRUARY.....that's not normal...WHAT THE FUCK???? I blame it all on the Americans and their polluting ways....I mean polluting ways cause of the shit they say....damn, I want to impale them with a giant stick!!!!!

In other unrelated news, I'm flarking hungry. I have a huge craving for something spicy....like a hot pepper, but sadly, all I have is this dirty napkin that I found on the ground...NO, I will not eat it...ok, maybe for 5 bucks, but no one has put the offer up yet.

Spring break is coming...but it's not a break. I think they should change the name from Spring Break, to "Spring Holy-shit-time-to-catch-up-since-i've-been-lazy-and-done-fuck-all-so-far Week"...I think it would be a lot more accurate, and bring me back down to earth. On the bright side, during the break I will be seeing a nice concert at the Main Hall on the 23rd, featuring the Jimmyriggers, Lee Mellor and the Mudhounds and The United Steel Workers of Montreal. I'm a bit biased towards the Jimmyriggers....so check 'em out, www.myspace.com/thejimmyriggers .

I love procrastination......I get so much done. SHUT UP, THAT WAS FUNNY OK.

Maybe I'll start going through amino acid and protein sequences now....this was fun, I will have more to rant soon..muahahahaha.

Today's Word of the Day: Leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeemur

Song of the Day: "Sweet Confusion"- By Divine Right

Person that should be killed today: The guy who invented those things you hold onto on the bus to avoid falling over....I fucking hit my head on one of them again today....DAMN YOU TO HELL YOU BATARDDDDDDDDDDDD

Keep Rockin' In The Free World,

-Nick le Extrordinaire

the Snow...it Burns!!!!!!!

2005-11-24T14:37:00.000-05:00

School is almost over, it's snowing outside and I'm sitting in a nice warm room in my good old hoodie. Things can't get any better... WRONG

I love the snow...don't get me wrong, but it's messing with me. I was supposed to go run errands today, but I can't cause the roads are ass and my car isn't good in the winter. Other than that, I find it rather interesting to watch the snow....As for the end of school....it's a good thing, except that this means EXAMS!!! Four of them...WOO FUCKING HOO!!!

At least all lab reports are done for the semester and I don't have to hand in Wednesday's till sometime in January. I finished my Natural Disasters paper...and I will toot my own horn and say it's fucking awesome. I have so much genius...I just forget where I put it.

Some of said that I have become very arrogant in recent weeks...maybe it's just cause I reached a level of such brilliance that I have to gloat Seriously....I'm approaching an Overlord type of stature...and soon I will kill you all....unless you make a sacrafcie...or just give me beer so I forget that I was going to kill you.

The plans for the ski trip are in the works.....in January, I will attempt to "ski". This will be made more difficult by the fact that a)I'll be hungover from the night before, b) I've never skied in my life, c) i'll probably be drunk on the slope...residual from the night before. It should be an awesome awesome weekend...now to find the money!!!

Ah yes, work is back. Corporate Christmas Party Season is here.....and I'm actually looking forward to it. I get to see lots of waitresses again and kitchen staff...so it should be an enterating time!!! Let's jsut hope the DJs are good.

I don't have much ammo today....the snow ahs made me happy and pensive...

Person #45023 who should die: The bastard who first started the trend of getting drunk at a party and tying your tie around your head..........BURN IN HELL YOU WHORE

Current Song: "Slow Hands" by Interpol

Good luck in exams and what not...check for an angry post soon!!!!

~the one, the only......fuck that, plain ol' NICK

Son of a Whore...

2005-11-13T14:37:00.000-05:00

So...you thought I died eh!?!?!

Don't worry, I'm back and I'll be stopping by (or trying to) every week.

What has happened since my last post??? NOTHING. My life is boring....SON OF A WHORE

Work is slowing down now...a few Christmas parties starting in December, then come January I will be unemployed!!! So I guess I'll start looking for something new soon. Many thanks to the BGC staff....I had an awesome season and surprisingly no one killed me!! Staff party was wicked...I was kinda wrecked, but so was everyone else. I still don't remember being in/ taking a bunch of the photos that are floating around...I guess it's par for the course. THAT WAS THE WORST GOLF JOKE EVER....

School has been a big olde whore recently...but at least Dr. Marcynski (or however you spell his name) has finally left. I can't take that guy...he bobs around like he has to piss and he laughs at his own lame jokes...who does that??? His random ass lectures on bacteria in Giant Squids...WHO THE FUCK CARES???? But not to worry, he'll be back with us in the lab come next semester....HAPPY HAPPY JOY FUCKING JOY!!!!

Hockey season is in full swing, and being a Habs fan, I am super pumped for this year. The team is solid...and could make a decent run this year. However, I'm still looking forward to the Olympics instead.....that's good hockey. Oh yeah, the Bruins suck ass.

Yesterday, I was working at a wedding anniversary party for this couple. They were from Egypt and many of their friends are as well. Earlier in the summer I had worked a Lebanese/Egyptian wedding. Do you want to know what these two things had in common??? A Scottish guy was there??? Is there any ethnic group that stands out more than a tall white Scottish guy in a full kilt and half-jacket and everything!!!??? Maybe I'm the only one that finds it weird....then again, it's me.

I'm fucking pissed off...I lost my gloves. They were super kick-ass gloves.....and they were warm. No I have naked hands.....I'm not happy.

Today is a sad day however. The parents are coming home. After a week of total freedom and eating lots of soup....no it's all coming to a bitter end. I'm happy they're coming home...but still. How will i explain the fact that I have three cases of empty beer in the garage???

Fuck this....I have to go write a stupid lab report....the worsdt 5 hours of my life!!!

Current Music: Tangiers-"Ro-Ro-Roland"

Person #3615 on my list of who should die: The bastard who has my gloves right now!!!

Goodbye, so long and farewell,

~Awesome Possum Nick

If It Feels Good Do It

2005-09-24T15:14:00.000-04:00

Howdy Folks,

I've been away for awhile...so I'm a bit rusty. It's sad to say that I haven't posted anything in awhile, for the simple reason that I havent had much to write about. It's been school, work, tennis, school and work......it has been fairly busy.

In keeping with tradition of boring weddings, I wrote down a list of my thoughts. This wedding was so boring that I only served 6 drinks (3 soft drinks, 1 glass of white wine, 1 Molson Ex and 1 Perrier).....if I can remember ALL of what I served...that means it's a pretty crappy night!

An insight into Nick's mind when he's left to his own devices:

- Why do bugs enjoy nibbling on me? Am I magically delicious or something? Do I look like I have tasty blood? Fucking bugs.

- My stomach hurts...damn coffee. (I left school the other day cause I felt like death.....and I've narrowed the culprit to coffee. Everytime I had coffee last year inbetween 201 and 202 (BIOs), I would feel a little shitty after our coffee run. This past Tuesday I went out for coffee with a friend and after I finished drinking it...I felt bad again. Friday was the culmination and the worse I've felt.....so if anyone sees me with coffee, you have permission to smack me....not that anyone asks for permission anyways)

- The vast majority of people cannot dance. They should all be shot for the good of the land.

- I need a vacation. It's been wayyyyyy to ong. Nick's ideal vacation: booze, tennis, booze....maybe some ocean water and sand......and maybe sun, but mainly booze!

- DISCO SUCKS. I know, it's already a scientific fact. However, every disco song whether it be on CD, cassette, record, 8-track, whatever, must be destroyed....FOREVER. If I hear "Stayin' Alive" or "Survive" again, I will SNAP. In the words of Mr. David Bowie "Bring me the Disco King" (from Reality, 2004)...I want the disco king so I can castrate the mother fucker and feed him to a bunch of leeches.

- Rhombus is a funny word. SHUT UP. I have problems eh

- I want Chinese tea....it's my craving of the moment.

In other exciting news, my parents arrived home from Scotland the other day...they may be going through alcohol withdrawl now, except my mom has some food poisoning issues right now. They did bring me back a couple presents. The first is a cool tartan scarf....which I will use. The second is an authentic Scottish Wool Sweater...like the dude from the Alexander Keith's commercial.......You better believe I will do that impression one day, so watch out!!!!!!!

Listening to: Sloan - "If It Feels Good Do It"

I guess I should study......damn nation. Another wedding tonight........WOO HOO

-the almighty NICK

Tragedy Here

2005-09-02T20:57:00.000-04:00

"New Orleans is Sinking, and man I don't wanna swim".

Who knew that these words written by Gord Downie in 1990 would be so prevalent all these years later. The song as you know is called "New Orleans is Sinking". It was voted one of the best Canadian Rock Songs EVER. This track will be taken off the play lists of many radio stations and for good reason. It is not because it is a negative song, but because of what has happened to the city of New Orleans in the last week.

The public has been blitzed with images of starving children, flooded homes and people with no place to go and nothing to bring with them. To make matters worse, their own Government wasn't even there to help them out before it was too late. I heard a comment on the news, "They were able to mobilize hundreds of thousands of troops to go to Iraq in 24 hours, but it took them 5 days to come to a place in their own homeland". It is a sad situation, and every person in politics should remember this: people's lives are not politics. When people are dying of thirst, dying of hunger and dying from not having their medications, when the supplies could've been there, it is not time to think of what will get your popularity up. The Mayor of Chicago told federal agencies he could send trucks and trucks of aid IMMEDIATLEY (this was 3 or 4 days ago), yet the Feds said "only send one truck". I don't want to harp on this too much. Everyone has seen the devastation, heard the personal stories of grief and heard the terrible actions, non-planning and neglect the Bush Administration gave to it's own citizens. Why would a rich Texan who's President of the most powerful country want to help a city where 40% of people live below the poverty line, are mostly black and wouldn't vote for him or the Republican party?

I would like to focus on another aspect of this disaster. This is more of a cultural disaster, more than anything else. As many of you know, I am a music junky. I enjoy many styles of music and I find that music can always say what words cannot. It can express emotions far beyond what any combination of words can. This is why it is so sad to see New Orleans Jazz and Dixie music gone. New Orleans is where so many genius musicians orginated. One of my personal favorites, B. B. King was from there. As was Mr. Fats Domino. Even though many people were impoverished, there are always stories from The Big Easy about kids playing their instruments in front of their houses, of children and families dancing and smiling, even though they had nothing. This just showed how powerful music can be for people. The music represented the people to the fullest. They were true sounds, pure sounds that these people made. If anyone has ever met anyone from New Orleans, even from the poorest slum, know that they are very kind people, that, no matter how bad things are, give them a guitar or a trumpet or anything, and they're smile lights up a room. Louisiana Blues is one of the most powerful forms of music....it is raw human emotion. That is why, even though I don't know anyone from New Orleans myself, I still feel it badly for these people. By listening to their music, I have learned about them as a people before this tragedy. That is why I'm holding back tears as I type this.

I'm extremely angry about what happened to these people. Not the hurricane...that couldn't have been avoided, but instead the response from government officials. I just truly feel sad for everyone affected. It is a terrible, terrible tragedy. Maybe more so than any other natural phenomena or terrorist attack or anything. To see someone who has nothing, reduced to less just makes me sick. I urge any of you that read this to make donations to what ever Aid organization to help these people, to help them have their city and their soul back. And not just for this tragedy, but for any organization that is truly trying to help those who are in desperate need. If you see a fundraiser somewhere, or someone passing a hat to help victims of New Orleans, PLEASE, give anything you can.

I have never been affected this much by a world event, this is truly a footnote in history...

"Bourbon blues on the street, loose and complete
Under skies all smoky blue green
I can't forsake a dixie dead shake
So we danced the sidewalk clean
My memory is muddy
What's this river that I'm in?
New Orleans is sinking man
And I don't wanna swim" from "New Orleans Is Sinking"

Thoughts, prayers and good wishes to everyone affected by this,

NICK

Finding My Way

2005-08-16T20:36:00.000-04:00

Here I was, working a wedding, except it was the most boring wedding ever. The bride didn't show up on the dance floor, or even kiss her new husband when people were doing that dumb clinging of glasses. As a result, I got extremely bored and proceeded to write a list of thoughts that were occuring to me at the time, so I will share them with you:

#1- I want sleeves on my work shirt! I have to wear short sleeve dress shirts....but I prefer long sleeve shirts that I can roll up to 3/4 ....why can't I have those??

#2- While looking at a wood doorstop that I have in the satellite bar (don't ask why I have it, I have a hammer in my other bar), I came to wonder, how many calories are there in a piece of wood? You know, for all of those crazy fucks who count the calories they eat and how many they lose when they go to the bathroom. I guess when you burn the doorstop, you are getting energy that can be converted into caloric units, but I'm talking more of the eating part.

#3- Why can't I be the Lord of the Dance? Anyone who has seen me dance before knows that I'm totally awesome....ir totally bad. If the former, I should be Lord of the Dance, if the latter, then I could at least be the Lord of the Crappy Dance..is that so much to ask???

#4- If reincarnation does in fact resist, how badly does someone have to fuck up their previous life to be reincarnated as a redneck??? Seriously, you must have done some pretty bad shit.

#5- I have discovered my love of neck ties....I want to go buy some now. But if you buy the tie, you have to buy a matching shirt. SWEET!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love ties, but not bowties. Bowties are the SPAWN OF SATAN (the evil one, I'm the nice one)

#6- Black lights kick serious ass.

#7- What are the point of ass pockets on pants? I don't put my wallet there, because when I want to sit in a chair, I don't want my wallet to jab me in the ass...it's quite uncomfy. When the first design of pants was made, what was the point of the ass pocket? It doesn't add any aesthetic value to the pant.....it's just dumb. But not as dumb as half pants......damn you Nadal.

#8- Ingela dancing.....here isn't much else to be said. To see someone just walking normally, then burst into a dance at the right beat and everything....it's a bit odd, but highly entertaining.

Yes, I have way to much time on my hands at work...sometimes. The past week was nuts with a huge 4-day tournament at the BGC, which meant overtime and lack of sleep!!! But after I jotted down these random thoughts, I got some guy super drunk, that he started hitting on Nicole (a waitress) and made his young daughter cry...since he was a drunk fucktard!

I had a brief hitting session today (tennis), and again I had no pain!!!! My serve is at about 70-75%...it's getting there slowly!

School starts soon, so I'll be seeing many people again real soon (ie, Maryse, Lopa, Nat, Sean, Em, Jasmina, Sara, Ali, JD and a few others). Good luck to everyone writing MCATs on the 20th, I say we go out drinking after, I have that night off!!!! To everyone writing supplementals, good luck as well, I'm sure you'll do well!

Other notes: Gayle and Chanti...you better be partying a lot, or I will get mad, Ing...your time in Montreal is winding down, sad yet?......Nancy....it's not the same without you at work, I have no one to bug, that's not true, but at least you fight back!Mir...where are you??? I call and your phone is off, so I cry!

I don't have anything else worth saying, take it easy everyone, and call me, I'm getting evenings off to go drinking!!! I have to do some drinking, it's summer tradition!

Keep on Rockin'

~the one and only NICK

What do batteries taste like?

2005-08-06T13:29:00.000-04:00

Oh, I'm back baby!

I want to know what batteries taste like.....WOW, my mind really is fucked up! I need beer, or sanity...I pick the beer!

I've had a very long absence, and I realize that most of you have been crying because of it, so I decided it was time to stop the tears.

Summer is slowly coming to an end....and then the real fun of evil, evil school will begin. Will I survive Duff Castle? Let's just hope I don't have to deal with Prof Douche (aka BAINES.....fucking Baines). The summer has gone rather quickley, as I have been working quite a bit, drinking not as much as I should and showering about the right number of times.

Last night I went out to see a great concert of The Redwalls (from Illinois) and The Shout Out Louds (from Sweden). I really went to see the Redwalls, but SOL put on a great show. The best part of the evening was standing around talking to the Redwalls after their set....nice guys, but they are really small. Seriously, they're about the size of smurfs. But they were nice guys, so I can't hold that against them!

For some of you who actually care, my shoulder is getting quite a bit better, so I am going to start the sports again soon.....untill the thing craps out on me again. Seriously, why do I have to have the most fragile body in the history of man kind......it's really aggravating me.

One thing that has just been pissing me off lately are arm bands. Everywhere I go, I see people wearing arm bands for no particular reason. First off, they are supposed to be used to absorb sweat when playing sports. That's why I wore one when I was training a few summers ago. They aren't a fashion statement. Who are you trying to fool? Why would you want to walk around with a piece of super absorbant material on your arm.....unless you want it to absorb all of your UGLY...which it can't do. Maybe people think that when an arm band is accompanied by a trucker hat, they get super powers.....YOU AIN"T GOT SHIT. You look like a fucking moron!!!! It's almost as sad as white guys wearing bandanas around in public....for shame.

The past few days I've been in the dancing mood. I just sort of sit around listening to music or whatever, and I get this sudden urge to dance. It's super scary because, as most of you know, I can't dance!!!! Imagine the most terrible white-boy dance ever....then imagine something worse and you'll be close to what I am!!! In fact, when I dance I sort of look like a llama trying to do the moonwalk......I know, it would be cool to see that, but it's still fucking strange.

I got cabin fever......fuck, the urge to dance is back. Someone get me a beer, it'll c alm me down. Beer donation can be made to the charity of Nick....you can phone for details of drop off!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love beer

I have to flee....I should migrate upstairs eventually in the search for livestock...I mean food.

I love beer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Take it easy everyone, and don't do anything that I wouldn't do!!!

- Lord of the Chair

P.S. If anyone wants to play some tennis, or get lessons, let me know....I'm dying to get on a court!

Dr. Chan

2005-07-26T23:50:00.000-04:00

We mourn the passing of Dr. Eddie Chan.

Not only was he one of the best U1 micro profs, but he was also a very kind man. I talked to him many times, and he was the most polite and courteous man that I've had the privelege to meet. Although we laughed at his antics (the long pauses in sentences, and his pronounciation of certain words, ie) protozaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa), we respected him immensely. He was a dedicated man; who else would still want to teach and coordinate a U1 class when you are a Professor Emeritus, have a lot of reasearch years under your belt?

From everyone that had the opportunity to meet him, to hear him or even to hear of him,

Thank you Dr. Chan, for everything

RIP

And The Adventure Begins Again...

2005-07-07T16:51:00.000-04:00

Hey Hey, My My,

How's everybody doing??? I've been better, but haven't most people. This summer hasn't shaped up to be what I thought it would be when I was pondering it a few months ago. Ah well, shit happens and happens and happens. I've this insane urge to get back onto a tennis court and reclaim some of my old glory....but it just hasn't happened. I need parteners dammit!!! So if any of you are interested, ring me up, and I'll serve it up. That was the worst pun ever....I'm very sorry, I don't know what got into me.

Yes, I will start another list of hatreds and annoyances. I got this idea from George Carlin when, during a show, he started off his next series of jokes by saying "the following list are of people I would like to see dead". He also did a "list of things that are pissing me off". I thought it was a brilliant idea, so I borrowed it for your entertainment.

The following items have made me want to beat someone to death with a piece of cardboard:

#1- Low Hanging Pipes. Maybe they aren't low hanging, but I still hit my head on them. There are two sets of pipes at work: one by the vault and the other at the beer room. Now, I know that they are there, yet I still hit my head on them. I'm getting fucking tired of it too. If those pipes don't stop fucking around with me, so help me Jebus I will take a saw and CUT YOU IN TWO PIECES.

#2- Construction Hardhats. I don't really hate these, but I hate not owning one. C'mon, what's more classy than a hardhat?? Fine, maybe top hats,beanies, cowboy hats, baseball caps....fine, everything is classier than a hardhat, but I still want one. DAMN TELEVISION ADVERTISING

#3- Bag Pipes. Probably the single most irritating sound in the history of music. I guess some people like them, but it seriously sounds like a hamster getting fed into a lawnmower, then being spit out at a screeching cat. Why is there no volume control and the bastards??? The only setting is FUCKING LOUD. I've never heard a soft song or ballad being played on the bag pipes......DAMN SCOTS. The only thing you guys have going for you are kilts....which reminds me, I want a kilt.

#4- The IOC. They gave the 2012 Olympics to London. Which is fine. Except, the Games should be in my backyard. I'd have 2 events: Drinkin' and Pole Vault. WHAT!?!?!? I love watching the pole vault. It would be the greatest Olympics ever. Drunken Pole Vault can only lead to some great TV and great athletic acheivement. Who needs cycling, or running or any of that crap. And if the Games are concentrated in my backyard, we would only need maybe 2 cameras to film everything.....it makes fantastic logistical sense. (Note: no American's are invited...you wouldn't be able to win the drinkin' events....Canadian Beer is to good for you!!!!)

#5- People Driving in a Mini Van with a big Ferrari Sticker on the back. How are you trying to fool???? You're driving a fucking mini van!!!!! Do you think because you put some gay looking horse sticker on your car that you'll be transformed into a speed demon??? NO, YOU WON"T!!! Why don't you put on a sticker that says" I'm trying to reclaim my manhood by putting this sticker on my car, since I was emasculated when I bought a mini van".....You people piss me off....Fuck Ferrari.....Fuck Mini Vans......If I ever see another one of you shit heads, I will take out my bb gun, shoot out all of your tires, pull you out of the car, slap you, then I'll spray you with WD-40 and light you on fire.......AHHHHHHHHHHHH......DIE DIE DIE DIE

Isn't therapy great. Who ever said that the little devil on your shoulder doesn't give you good advice? This concludes another entry...I'm going to now go and pick up my guitar and make some more noise...I can't bring myself to learn anything....I'm still having to much fun just messing around!

"You hit rock bottom and everybody knows it, but does anybody care how you got there?"

Take care everyone,

NICK

It's ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE

2005-06-28T00:50:00.000-04:00

What's Up Girls, Boys and those in between!

As I type this blog, my finger are red....with blood!!!!!!! No, not really. They're stained red because of fucking grenadine!!! It had to be Junior Night at work....I got those kids so fucking wired on sugar!!! I hate making 70 shirley temples and cherry cokes and all that crap. It's a pain to put fucking cherries on sticks to put in the drinks to keep those little fucktards happy. I feel like shoving fire crackers up their asses and seeing how far I can shoot them into the sky, before they tumble back to earth where I will beat the living crap out of them with a frozen slab of beef.

There are many things to be angry with in this so called "world" of ours. Here is just a few more things that have been annoying me like having multiple paper cuts underneath your fingernail:

#1- Potholes. They are everywhere on the road. I drive along St. Charles and I'm afraid I'm going to get lost in on of these god damn craters. Honestly, you could fit 15 midgets in some of these holes, and still have room for them to play twister. Instead of fixing them, money is being spent on other roads that, to me anyways, were perfectly fine before. Fcuk the governement and their spending...I shake my fist at you ....you, you FOOLS!

#2- St. Jean Baptiste Day. Yes, it is a good drinking holiday......but it's NOT A FUCKING HOLIDAY. I will not support a holiday that promotes separatists to come out for a "fete nationale" (sorry, I have no accents on this key punching thing...or I'm too lazy to use them, you be the judge). It's not a national holiday. Our national holiday is Canada Day on July 1st, because, last I checked, Quebec is part of the Greatest Country in the World....CANADA. I don't see Saskatchewan having a "National Holiday" called Wheat-fest or anything like that. I don't mind getting the extra pay on the day, or out having a good party, but when I do go out it's not because I'm proud to be a Quebecer, or anything like that. It's because i want to see friends and have a good time. I know some people may be offended by I'm not a Quebecer". I'm not. I wasn't born here, though I have lived here for a long time. I'm A Canadian first and foremost and that is all that matters. For me, St JB Day is just a pansy warmup for Canada Day!

#3- Budweiser, Bud Light, Coors Light, Miller Light etc... YOU ALL SUCK. YOUR A PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR BEER. Whoever "invented" these products should be dragged to a McDonalds and used for spare parts in Big Mac's. Seriously, whats the point of drinking light shit that has no flavour and less alcohol....fuck, why not have a pansy fruity drink that at least has alcohol. FUCK YOU AMERICAN PANSY BEER

#4- Hips. Why the fuck does my hip bone/joint keep cracking. FUCK YOU HIP.....don't be angry, I need you to move.

#5- Bicycles. I have no problem with people riding bikes, or bikes themselves. Only when they are half in you lane when you're driving. There's oncoming traffic and you can't pull around to pass them. You end up going about 0.5 km/hr, and you have people honking behind you and you back up traffic.......are you people to dumb to not realize that you should move into the BIKE LANE< AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE CAR LANE!!!! Next time I see you of you fuckheads, I'll just run you over. I've had it. Some of the hardcore cyclists are fine, because they actually go fast enough, but some balding fat ass white guy, with socks to his knees, ass hanging off the seat, wearing a shirt that can't cover your fucking fat stomach....YOU WILL DIE. Use the bike lane for the love of God.....or so help me God, YOU=DEAD

#6- Paperclips. Who am I kidding?!? I love paper clips. I cry everytime one breaks. Plus I like to chew on them....and pen caps. Oh how I miss class...where I sit for hours chewing on pen caps and writing notes on stolen Timmy H napkins. But seriously, everytime a paperclip breaks, a dog is castrated against his will....it's true, check it out!!! It's fucking sad. So no breaking paperclips, let the dogs have their balls.

That's all I really have for now. I'm turning into a guitar virtuoso, so watch out everyone, I will take the world (in my head) by storm!!! Now I just have to find a bassist, drummer, manager, record label, groupies, fans, a stage, a rubber duck (personal use only), a Foam Dome (hard hat that holds your beer with straws...CLASSY!), the lost treasure of the Incas and a dugout canoe. I give myself 5 minutes.....fuck it, too lazy for this shit.

Take Care everyone, have a marvelous Canada Day, I have that night off, so I am free if there are any plans floating about!!!

Rock on, and have a drink on me........and be sure to SEND THE MAN BACK HOME (that would be to wherever he's from).

Before I forget, some Canada Day pointers: 1) Drink Beer, or Canadian distilled liqour only, 2) Drink it in excess, 3) Always know who you're waking up next to in the morning, 4) Nothing beats a girl holding a Molson Canadian, in the bar on July 1st!!! one of the sweetest sights ever

"Don't turn around, because the reason is treason"

~ the one and only NICK

Time To Take Out the Trash

2005-06-21T23:28:00.000-04:00

Hey Everyone,

I haven't been here in awhile, what can I say? I've been working a shit load, and yeah, I don't really have an excuse, so deal with it.

I've been thinking. I want to recapture my old anger...it led to some pretty entertaining blgos if I may say so. I'm not really angry...so I'll need to channel some other kick ass phenomena (I probably spelt that wrong.....SHUT UP)

What has been happening in my life??? Work has been fun: what's not to like? I serve booze, I don't have to work too hard at times, and I work with women....it's the sweet life!!! Oh yeah, I'm getting paid pretty good to do it also! Let the good times roll. Yes, someone probably already coined that expression, I don't fucking care, I'm taking it now.........MUAHAHAHA

So far this summer has been pretty good. I enjoy not being in school, but I do miss 'the crew".....we had many good times sitting through MIMM211....just wait untill our INSANE labs....I will try and keep you all entertained so the time flashes by...and I may study too, so I don't distract you guys all the time....only part of the time. As for all of my non-micro-200/201/202 peeps.......I'll harass you from time to time, don't worry.

Here are some things that have been on my mind:

#1 - Half Pants. Some people call them "capris".......WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY!?!?!?! If you want to wear shorts, wear shorts. If your in a pants mood, wear pants......why go in between? It's not like you can roll them up!!! Besides, I'm sure they're the same price as pants, so the store is just making more profit off you. Plus, they're just ugly

#2 - Arm bands. Every second dumb punk asshole kid has an arm band or something. the funniest is the white suburban kid, who spikes his hair and wears a red, yellow and green arm band.....do you think you're Jamaican??? You're white from the suburbs...I don't think you should be preaching the Jamaican culture, you know nothing about it you dick head. Or 12 year olf kids who call the Sex Pistols their great influence. First off, their music wasn't that good. And secondly, they were relevant in a time when you weren't even born!!!! You know nothing about their plight or what they were fighting about. Go soothe your "angst" by getting a coffee at fucking Second Cup with Daddy's money...OK!?!?!? Damn fucking cretins.

#3 - MuchMusic. Occaisonally they will play some good videos by the White Stripes, or the Kaiser Chiefs, The Arcade Fire or other good indie and rock bands. But I flicked to the station a few times in an hour, and I saw the new fucking Eminem video 4 times........4 times in a fucking hour. The video isn't even that good. I don't want to see Eminem as a muppett.....even Kermit could kick his ass. Why don't they play some good music. I just know that this Eminem tripe is still going to be better then whatever new garbage is put out by Maroon 5 where everyone will fall in love with it. If I saw Maroon 5 walking along the street, I would spit on them, shave their heads, and make them wear a sign that says "Look, I'm Bald!!!" then I would find a Guillotine and chop their fucking heads off.....the pricks

#4 - My Ceiling Fan. I love because it's the only cooling system in my home, which doesn't have AC. But it makes so much fucking noise. If I turn it off when I try to sleep, I'm too hot. If I turn it on, it rattles and makes me go even more inasne.......FUCK YOU CEILING FAN.......but I love you

#5 - My Rotator Cuff. Why did you fucking have to damage yourself........prick

#6 - My lack of a band. Yes, I've been playing for about 2 weeks now, and I still suck, but that doesn't mean that I shouldn't start a band. I'm already better than any post-punk band out there, and most metal bands. But I guess I'm just so amazing, and my singing talent is so great that the world isn't ready for me.....yet

That feels better. I'll try and keep updating the site a lot...and have more lists of shitty ass things. But I need YOU guys to comment and to tell me waht you want me to write about. I will tackle all issues. I cannot speak of my own greatness however, because well, there just isn't enough room or words. Instead, you can build a shirne to me in your rooms, on your ceilings, or wherever else you wish....but please, no bathroom shrines....that's just really fucking dirty!!!

Have a good time world, I'll try and stay alive, out of jail, and out of trouble for awhile longer,

- Hungry Hungry Nick

P.S. Em......I'll miss you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But do have fun, and remember, don't do anything I wouldn't do. This means that you must never be sober, never mind your tongue and never frown!!!

You're All Diseased

2005-06-05T14:43:00.000-04:00

Hello my fellow Tools,

Ah yes, summer is here. Two weeks ago, people were complaining and saying "where's our summer? Why is it so fucking cold?". And last night I hear, "why is it so hot?"....WHAT THE FUCK. MAKE UP YOUR MIND PEOPLE. If you want something, why would you complain when it finally arrives??? Maybe it's me who doesn't quite understand the human mind, but seriously, people are dumb.

I found out some fun news yesterday. At work, we have a wedding on every Saturday untill mid-October....FUN TIMES. There are something like 17 weddings left to do, and I have to work probably around 16 of them.....FUN TIMES. At least the money is decent.....but it's insane!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This week, looks like Thursday, I'm finally going to have my shoulder looked at!!! After I was wiping a counter and could feel it pulse and hurt, I guess it's time eh!!! Yeah, but I'm still playing some tennis....just because I'm dumb and I like to hurt myself.

I just heard a great quote from George Carlin...talking about bullshit and the USA. I will share some of his thoughts with you: "America's leading industry, is still the manufacturing, packaging and selling of bullshit. High quality, grade A, prime cut, pure American bullshit. Bullshit is everywhere. This entire country is completely full of shit and always has been. From the declaration of independance, to the constiution, to the star spangled banner, it's still nothing a big steaming pile of red, white and blue bullshit. Think of how we started, this country has founded by a group of slave owners who said that all men were created equal...except for blacks, indians and women right!? Americans really show their ignorance when they say they want their politicians to be honest. What are these fucking cretins talking about. If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse. No one would know what to do! Honesty would fuck this country up"

I love you George Carlin....one day I'll try and write up his "Airport Security is bullshit":......it's one of the funniest things I've ever listened too!!!!

Hope you guys are enjoying your summer, I will write soon!

-Needle Nose Pliers

One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces

2005-05-29T16:27:00.000-04:00

Hello Tools and Spools,

Summer is here...well sort of. Our good friend Mother Nature has decided to annoy us with this cold, rainy and not very summer-like weather. Personally, Mother Nature is going though PMS or menapause or something, because this just ain't right!

As summer tradition goes, friends from school all go in different directions, only to catch up later, when the stress comes back. I'm going to try and reverse this trend, so if you're reading this, expect a phone call soon! Well, except for you Maryse, you live to far away. Kristelle- you will get a call soon, Sean- we may have to make a little excursion down to Steve's, Emilie- I will call eventually!, Alison- are you still alive?, Jasmina- same question.

So far my summer has been pretty non-eventful...and the events that do happen are never good!!! I have succesfully made a drunken fool of myself, hurt my shoulder pretty badly and pissed off a few people along the way...yup, the rest of the summer can only be good!!!

So I watched a part of the "Great" Indy 500 tday...and it was probably the most boring piece of shit that has ever been on TV. I watched about 20 laps, since I had nothing better to do on my day off, and I was bored senseless. How can 300,000 people go to watch cars that are all fucking standardized (same weight and all that jazz), making left turns all day, for something like 200 laps....are you people that pathetic??? Are Americans so dumb that they get mesmerized by little shiney cars driving in circles??? I mean, shit, the senior PGA tour is more exciting than this tripe. I would rather watch a guy hammering nails into a piece of wood, then watching 200 laps of CRAP. I cannot believe I wasted all that time watching the race, when I could have done something useful, like taming a Moose...I WILL DO IT

There has been excitment watching the French Open (tennis) though....there's been some amazing matches, and the best part is that there are 0 American men left!!! They all lost before the 3rd round!! This makes me so happy, it's unbelieveable. Take that you dumb Americans. I guess none of them wanted to play, since they were going to miss the INDY 500...which is a shame since peewee hockey in Mexico is probably more exciting than the race.

As many of you know, I enjoy making many HMV runs. I've decided to try and curb my HMV spending habits...I need to save at least some money for a few things to buy this summer, and to save for a trip to an all-inclusive resort somewhere after finals, right before next summer. Is anyone interested? C'mon, as much as you can drink, and eat, and drink, ona beach, for about $1200-$1300 MAX........did I mention that it's warm and there's a beach and tons and tons of booze and it's all pre-paid..........I LOVE IT

I'm off hip-cats, I'm going to go try and vent some energy somewhere, that isn't in this dark hole that I call a basement. I will update again soon

KEEP ROCKIN' THE FREE WORLD

-A Legend in the Making

Stay Tuned...

2005-05-16T13:49:00.000-04:00

What is Happening Everybody....rhetorical question, please don't answer it

All I can say is that summer is oh so slowly coming near. Since it is the summer, I assume that people will be spending less and less time behind their computers, so naturally no one may see this post for a very very long time.

I don't have a lot of things to bitch about...life is calm and serene...like an elephant taking a bath (use your imagination people!!!). It's nice to have Dawson back in town from the wilderness, there will be lots of catching up to do, and a few beers that have to be drunk along the way.

It's time to start the summer sports soon. Hopefully I can actually get some decent tennis training in....unless my shoulder decides to fuck up again and leave me in pain for another couple months....asshole. At least my ankle is feeling like it's 90% healed...which is probably the best that it's been since I was in the womb,

It will be time to Rock Out again this Wednesday when Kasabian are in town.....super sweet band, tickets are still on sale, $15, in case anyone is interested! That is about the most exciting thing that will happen to me in the next few weeks. After that, it is work, work and work....

Emilie, you forgot to give m Kristelle's dessert....I'm very very disapointed......I wanted more of that dessert! Damn Kristelle, with no more genetics, I think I'm going to go into dessert withdrawl....sob sob. I don't know who else I should "shout out" to...because I don't know who is reading this. Maryse, you better comment dammit!!!!!!!!!

This post wasn't funny at all.....I feel bad about that. To try and salvage some of my reputation, here goes nothing: What?!?!?! I said here goes NOTHING. What the fuck, am I supposed to come up with something, even when I said I was going to do nothing!!! What has society turned into??? Is it expected that I should do the opposite of what I say????? I GIVE UP

GO HOME

-the 8th Wonder of the World

(you will get something funny later)

Hiatus

2005-05-07T17:02:00.000-04:00

Howdy All,

Sorry I haven't been writing much up here recently, but I've been very busy.

This is going to be extremely short. I'm in a bit of a funk right now, so I won't write anything for a bit. I need some time to digest things that are going on around me. But don't worry because I will be back soon with some more (hopefully) entertaining tidbits!!!

Rock on boys and girls

NICK

So Close....

2005-04-26T17:05:00.000-04:00

HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Yes, I'm going mad.....so close to being done. All that is in my way is Genetics, Stats and some sort of Roadblock......DAMN THEM ALL.

I really should be studying right now, but NO. I'm exercising my right as a lazy student to writ on the blog. I haven't shown up here i nawhile because I've actually been studying...it's a shock, I know. The only thing getting me through this week of Hell (the bad kind of Hell that is) is knowing that a little Leprachaun is holding a nice keg of Guiness for me at the end of the Rainbow......BOOYA

News Flash.........SNUGGLES is BACK............Bow Down to SNUGGLES

'Tis the season of partying coming up......this means a)lots of BBQ-ing, b) Lots of good company (except for those that I do not like...I WILL hurt you...I kid) and c) Lots of moderate-cheaply priced beer!!!

I don't really have anything else much to complain about......ummm......Yeah, I got nothing. I'm just so close to finishing and passing....then I can REJOICE and SING, SING, SING.........I'm A lumberjack and I'm OK, I sleep all night, I work all day.............Sorry folks......I get a bit carried away

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (Snuggles will take over the world....but I do need a sidekick(s)....I'm taking CV's and applications now.....just email them too ncollicutt@hotmail.com or collicutt@gmail.com)

ROCK ON BOYS AND GIRLS.......good luck to all in school or in boring ass jobs!

SNUGGLES

Burning = Bad

2005-04-14T23:02:00.000-04:00

Why do I have a burning sensation IN my left elbow and behind my left knee cap??????

WHY DO I HAVE THE BODY OF A 65 YEAR OLD MAN?????????????????????/

FUCK WHOEVER DID THIS TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DIE YOU BATARD

Enjoy the Weekend!!!!!!

Hurting Nick

Holy Crap

2005-04-13T13:28:00.000-04:00

Kristelle,

Those things you made with the chocolate and the what not were AMAZING. I can now die a happy man after eating them. YOU"RE THE BEST

NICK

Almost Done Eh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-04-13T07:45:00.000-04:00

Hey Hey,

Today is the last day of classes!!!! Finally eh!!! Yes, I am here very early in the morning, but it's not my fault. My bus driver was fucking nuts and red lined the bus all the way to Lionel-Groulx....that crazy bastard!!! Since it is the last day of class, I have to say thank you to everyone in my classes that I have annoyed and prevented from learning. This semester, and year for that matter, has been full of good friends, good times and occasionally good beer!!!!

There really isn't nothing new to report in Nickland. My life is getting pretty dull because of exams....three weeks and there all done. So if I have turned into an irritable ass (and not the good kind) I do apologize.

Wait wait wait. Am I being nice and apologizing and not being angry??? Why yes!!! And you aren't drunk???? No...I am quite sober eh! What can I be angry about? There really isn't any point griping about school, because it's pretty much the same for all.

I saw the most disgusting, disturbing, yet intriguing picture the other day. It was a snake eating a kangaroo!!!! He was eating it all at once! How the fuck does that work??? It's amazing! It looked sort of like those cartoons where the imprint of whatever the snake it is still there...anyone know what I mean??? Probably not. DAMN THE MAN!!!!

I have also come to loathe fluorescent lights. They are too damn bright and they hurt my eyes when I stare into their hypnotic glowing glow. Everything light should be a black light, just because they kick so much ass.

I need breakfast. Why don't I bring food with me??? Why am I so dumb??? We have a Timmy H muffin run after Genetics, but I can't wait that long!!! Maybe I should use some that genetics to engineer an extra arm that I can gnaw off, your take a bite when I get hungry. It would make so much sense!!! Recycling at it's best!!!!

DOWN WITH THOSE DAMN SMALL SEATS IN LEACOCK AUDITORIUM. ONLY ONE MORE DAY AND NO MORE BRUISED KNEES!!!!

SUCCESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, the Abbott awards are this Friday night. Will tennis win anything? NO. We sucked. Will I win for being the best coach in the history of everything? NO. Will I win as being the most knowledgeable guy coaching? NO. Will I be named sexiest coach in history? NO. Will I win anything? NO......................................but I'm still going to go to carry out, THE PLAN!!!!!!!!!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Don't worry, there is no plan. I'm not THAT smart to out-smart Glen and Demon Man (aka Steve Shaw).......bastard.

Untill the next time loyal subjects of Nickology,

Nick-ouhda

If You Choose Not to Decide, You Still Have Made a Choice

2005-04-08T21:40:00.000-04:00

Hello Ladies, Gentlemen and Those Who Aren't Quite Sure,

It is that time of the year again. No, not Spring or some other random holiday, but WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP CURLING TIME!!!! Ah yes, Canada just beat Norway (the defending Olympic Gold Medallist). The Norwegian skip fucked up his last rock and Canada stole 1 in the 10th end to win the match.......BOOYA!!!! Go Canada. I love curling!!!!!

Another evening, another wasted evening of NO STUDYING. Actually, I did do a stats assignment, but I'm pretty sure it's wrong. I don't really care, at least I can feel that I accomplished something eh!!!! Tomorrow I will actually study something useful.....no, not Genetics or Cell Bio, they aren't useful, but I may study the complexity of the AC/DC and their lyrics and musical styles and/or influences!!!! AC/DC ROCKS...STILL!!!!

I don't have much to bitch about today. I'm in a great mood because the last week has been pretty kick ass...Only 3 more days of school (then studying and exams, but who's counting????) I really want to rant...let me probe my mind with a toothpick to find out.....don't try that at home....IT FUCKING HURTS.

I just came up with the "Greatest Idea Ever Made by Anyone".....but I won't tell you becasue I'm sure one of you Capitalist dogs will steal my idea and leave me with NOTHING. So Fuck You, I will not let that happen. I will just sit here, spin in my chair, and laugh to myself......HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

Ok, next, suivant!I keep seeing this guy on the 217 that looks like Peter Sellers...I Love Peter Selleres.....one of the great actors of all time...better then Leonardo "The Pervert" DiCaprio or that fucking drugged out kid from Home Alone.....fuck I hate that movie. It was cool when you were 7, but now, after seeing it nearly a 100 times, you realize what a giant load of crap it is.

Today's song of the day is "Diamonds" by Boy....it's a bit Country-esque, but it still has a great rock feel to it, and a nice little acoustic riff. Another great country type rock song is "Cocaine Cowgirl" by Matt mays and El Torpedo.....on of the CD's on my list to pick up tomorrow!

This week marked the passing of Pope John Paul II.....although I'm not a Catholic, it still is a shame because even with some of his "radical" viewpoints that I don't agree with, he was still a good man who led his people well and who did lots for Catholics and non-Catholics alike. RIP

NHL Newsbreak: NOTHING THE FUCK HAPPENED. MILLIONAIRES ARE STILL WHINNING TO EACH OTHER AND I'M GETTING AGITATED. Thank God there is at least junior hockey to watch that is mildly entertaining.....I love watching kids who are younger AND better than me....it makes me feel like I could have accomplished something......wait, most of those kids are probably pretty dumb seeing as how they don't go to school and won't make it in the NHL......now I don't feel so bad. ROCK ON BROTHERS......KEEP THE HOCKEY COMING. You guys are very close to being hero #1246 of mine (collectively).

What else can I say.......Fuck, this post wasn't angry at all. KI don't know what's happening. Maybe I'm just to mellow before exams, but after (I mean during) exams I'll probably bitch A LOT and make fun of some more random shit!

Question: What would happen if you mated a Gorilla with a Spork-Wielding Sea Otter......Anser: WHO THE FUCK CARES AND WHY DID YOU THINK ABOUT IT. Alternate answer: Who Cares, it doesn't mention a penguin, SO WHO GIVES A FLYING RAT'S ASS????

Today's Person To Die: Taht guy there...who did the thing. Anyway, it really pissed me off and I want to kill the fucker.

Good Bye, Adios, Happy Studying, Happy Drinkin', Happy whatever else you want considering right now there isn't much else besides booze and books? (I guess Women too......)..Fine, scratch books off the list and replace with Women.

Peace Out

Senor Silly Pants.......aka The Omnipotent Ruler of All Things Alive, Dead and In Limbo (and I mean ALL)

I was Drinking Bolshoi Vodka the Enitre Time !?!?!?!?!

2005-04-04T19:55:00.000-04:00

Hey Hey Hey,

Another week is descending upon this fair land of ours, and it looks like it's going to rain, rain......and rain some more. DAMN RAIN. I hate having to waterproof my bag each day. It's annoying packing everything into plastic bags and hoping, HOPING it doesn't leak. Shiver me timbers!!!!

What to say, What to say...Let's start here. I heard something interesting today, something actually thought that soccer wasn't an Olympic sport. WHAT THE FUCK!!!! Soccer is the most widely played sport in the WORLD, of course it's in the Olympics. How can there be an Olympics without it? EH? The reason we don't see it on TV is because the Professionals aren't allowed to play, so it's usually younger guys (and girls).

Next: Youppi! Yes, there has been lots of talk about him (or her, or whatever the fuck it thinks it is) joining the Canadiens family. First off, he was an Expos mascot, not a Montreal mascot, not a mascot of our culture. He's a big giant orange blob. Last time I checked, the only thing ORANGE I've ever seen at a hockey game were the Calgary Flames, some guy's puke, some Ketchup that went bad and...well that's it! Youppi! has no place in the Bell Centre. You don't need a mascot to get the fans excited. IT'S HOCKEY. It's entertaining in itself. Anyone who has been to a game knows that Montreal fans don't need to be poked and proded into cheering and acting like dumbasses. Basbeall on the other hand, we needed Youppi!. Not necessarily because he made us laugh, or cheer or be proud of the Expos because of him (again, orange blob). Instead, he captured our hearts and imaginations when we would hurl souvenir baseballs at his groin in hopes of winning that $5 bet that you and your drunk friends made. Fuck Youppi!, make him go get a job singing and dancing in front of a store, in some little shit Quebec town in the country, where no one will know a) Who the fuck he is, b) what the fuck he's doing there and c) What the fuck is he. These colourfull Hicks will then pull out their modified shot guns and hunt the fucker down like the pseudo-animal he is.

In other related news, I WANT PEANUTS. The first person to drive to my house, or my igloo up North, will be given some respect, in exchange for 19.742 kg. I have a scale, so you bring more (or less...but preferablly more) I will break your legs, sell your organs, and keep the peanuts as your punishment. You want's to step up first???? C'mon, it's a sweet sweet deal....Maryse? Sean? Nat? SOMEBODY BRING ME SOME PEANUTS

I had a weird repeating dream the last few nights. It involved me kicking the crap out of some stranger. The face was kinda distorted...after I punched the crap out of him, but it was still someone vaguely familiar, so it's kinda weird, but gratifying at the exact same time. My other dream involved a toaster from space, some mozarella cheese, 4 blades of grass (from a lawn, not marijuana), a skirt, a spork and 15 L of poutine gravy. I could tell you what I did with it all...but you may all get very very disturbed. Let's just say it involved torture, food, mowing the lawn and many other wholesome activities.

It's time for me to flee, I have many important things to do (stare at the wall), people to see (the dust bunny I call Logan), places to go (under the table) and all the rest of that mumbo jumbo.

Untill the Next Time (which will be soon...I promise. No more of this once a week bullshit)

Your Hero.......ME

Not So Angry Rant......I miss the anger, oh, found it!!!

2005-03-30T14:14:00.000-05:00

Hey Hey,

I know I haven't written in awhile, but I've been surprisingly busy and stuff. Now I'm back and a have a few bones to pick...MUAHAHAHA.

Happy Belated Easter to All, or at least Happy Belated School Break.

I've started to ready myself for finaly exam season...the worst time of the year. I have come to realize the amounts of useless, useless knowledge that I've been taught this semester. Phospholipase C......who cares; Tyrosine Receptor Kinases......what the fuck are those? Mouse cells are positive for the TK gene.....good, if I knew what the Hell that gene was good for. This is my beef with school, they keep teaching dumb shit that has no real significance unless you are going to stay in academia and waste away examining the interaction between the polypeptides produced by the YDF (You Dumb Fuck) gene and BAS (Boring Ass Shit) gene. I look over some of the reasearch done by my biology profs and all I see is random things. Example: Dr. Roy is studying a knockout gene (or something like that) in C.elegans. For those who don't know what C.elegans is, it's a FUCKING NEMATODE...or round worm......some dumb thing. I don't see how this has relevance to anything really....YAY, I LEARNED WHAT A GENE DOES IN A WORM...WOOHOO. Big Fucking Deal. On a side note, Roy should be castrated for being a fucktard.
At least in Micro I've seen some research that could lead somewhere. Example: Dr. mathleshewski researching the Human Papilomma viruses to help create a vaccine......that could serve the public good......NOT FUCKIN NEMATODES, FRUIT FLIES OR THAT FUCKING WEED ARABADOPSIS.

How I could use a break from school! I think the 4 months that I'm out of it might recharge my batteries and help me gain a more positive outlook...but who knows, maybe this first year has made me bitter enough for the eons to come.

Another thing, why does it smell like CRAP outside EVERYWHERE!?!?!?!?! No matter where I go, it smells like feces. I thought Springtime was supposed to be all nice and fun with things growing back and the such.....instead all I smell is crap....which I don't find that pleasant. I just can't wait because in a couple months those Farmers at Abbott are gonna shit up the fields again, and now that I live closer to there, I'll smell it more.......YAY, FREAKING FANTASTIC MAN!!!!!

I saw "Finding Neverland" recently.........not a bad movie except for the lack of Peter Pan kicking the crap out of Hook.....maybe it's just me, but I was ready for some gut busting Kung-Fu ass whooping by Johnny Depp. It wasn't a bad movie as a whole though......good acting, good costumes, etc...

Do I bother mentioning a bunch of little inside jokes.......NO. I'm bound to leave someone out, then they'll hunt me down and try to hurt me....or bruise me, or just make fun of me. So NONE OF THIS. I miss hockey.......old tapes only carry me so far...........DAMN YOU NHLPA AND NHL.........I'LL GO BEAT YOU ALL UP WITH A BAG OF RUSTY DOORKNOBS.........oh yes, it's very very painful.

I'm going to go....I probably should do something more constructive with my time I guess......
Take Care ALL

Your Favorite NICK

Hear Ye, Hear Ye

2005-03-19T22:45:00.000-05:00

Howdy Everyone,

It seems as though the World is back to it's oldself....Going crazy and fucking everyone over! Gotta love it when school is almost over, so close, then you realize you have a bunch of exams to study for....its like getting some kick ass ice cream then having the scoop fall off the cone and into a puddle of oil left by some car. Usually I'm the one loitering in front of the store laughing at those pathetic bastards......HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....so many wasted afternoons!

Yes, It's 10:48 on a Saturday night and I'm at home. I couldn't find anything to do....it's not my fault. There is March Madness on TV.....I got to watch University of Wisconson-Milwakuee beat up Boston College.....it was probably the best game I've seen in awhile for the simple reason of the pure hustle and heart shown by both teams.

Do you know what really pissed me off today? Black ice. I was walking to the Dep, to pick up some milk (don't ask) and the sidewalk looked clear. Was it? Of course not. I was slidding everywhere. Maybe it was because I decided to wear joggin shoes, but still........fucking ice. I was tempted to go outside with my hatchet (YES, I have one!!!!) and teach that smart ass ice a lesson. But then rationality (the fucking bastard) took over, and it told me to get a beer, so I listened. Alexander Keith makes a good argument!

I'm surprisingly "loosey goosey" (a little School of Rock quote there for you Kristelle)...I don't know why. I should be angry with rage throwing a bottle of rye at the computer and missing it enitirely, but I can't bring myself to do that! I have found what my new hobby will be: Chewing on pen caps. Yes, you people see me do it during school, but I've been doing it at home now too.....and they all have different textures. I'm thinking of writing a book on it, titled: "Who the Fuck Paid this Asshole to Write a Book: The Evolution of Pen Cap Chewing". Personally, I think it has a nice ring to it. I could start a course at McGill on Pen Chewing then give a fucking brutal midterm just to make students angry...that would be such a great class. My exam would contain questions that do not pertain to pen chewing. Example: 1) Which is the only NHL team to win the Stanley Cup as an expansion team? 2) The Cleveland barons turned into which modern NHL team? 3) Which Australian tennis great was nick named "Skunky"?.....that would teach students to study the material....it does nothing! Profs like pulling random objects from their rectums (see ANAT 261: Introduction to Dynamic Histology). If any of you can answer those question without "google-ing" them...I'll be very impressed....oh, I'll know if you researched them...I have odd and creepy (but strangley arousing) powers!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As I sit here listening to Black Sabbath (In the Void...kick ass tune), I think to myself....my feet are cold, I should wear socks tomorrow.

And now for the inside jokes: Kim-Duke sucks ass....I don't know how they even made it into the tournament, Elisa-how was teh concert? I'm sure it was garbage, but stil, I'm curious, Emilie-I'm adding "Guru" to my list of occupations, Kristelle- I'm talented and I didn't spill the drinks!!!! Nat- I'm washing the sweatshirt as we speak, Mel-I will kill you.....top o' the list with you!, Jasmina-The plate was HUGE...I'm still full, Alison- I will get an egg thingy Monday morning, Sean-Dwon with MISA...I'm gonna ru n next year and take over with an iron fist...and a heart of gold....who am I kidding, the heart will be pure evil too, Steph- I had another Indian dream, Tara-details....give me details, Sara- you won't read this, but stop being mean to me! JD-give me the socks or I will hurt you....or just stun you and take the socks.

It's time that I be gone.....so I leave you with this final thought: fuck it, I can't think of anything good, so I'll keep you all in suspense and you'll get a one sentence post when I get inspiration....FUCK OFF, I'M TIRED. I CAN'T BE BRILLIANT ALL THE TIME.....when did I become so arrogant...why didn't you stop me!? The power has gone to my head!

Rock On Boys, Girls and those in between,

-The Town Crier

FUCK THE STRIKE

2005-03-16T20:45:00.000-05:00

Ok Boys and Girls, looks like McGill is having a strike on Friday, March 18th, 2005.

WHO GIVES A FUCK

Let us get this straight. We are striking because the Government took away some bursary money. OK. Even though we have the lowest tuition in North America, that ALL education up untill University is paid for by the Government. I don't understand how people (Quebecers) can come and say that they are $20,000+ in debt after an Undergraduate Degree. Hmmm....I know people from out of province who are paying their own tuition, room and board, books and all expenses without a scholarship and do you know what their debt is after a BSc.? 0 FUCKING DOLLARS. IT'S CALLED A JOB, GET ONE!!!!!!!!!!!

As a Quebec student, we pay about $4,000 for tuition and books per year (on average). How can you get a debt of $22,000 dollars after 3 years? Are you hiring hookers everynight or something? What the fuck is wrong with you people. I understand that some people are in financial difficulty for whatever reason, but $22,000 dollars!!!!!!!!! That is waht guy said on the news........you have to be kidding me. I work during the summer and school, and I can pay off all my bills (if my parents didn't). I guess the Quebec mentality is that you should be spoon fed everything; that the governemnt should take care of you. LEARN SOME FUCKING RESPONSIBILITY.

Another funny thing, these people have been organizing strikes and protests and all this shit, but haven't been going to class. Doesn't it occur to these people that if they GO to class, they can learn, so they don't fail, which would make them take an extra semester and force them to be more in debt!?!?!?!?!!? Seriously, the Government isn't here to wipe your asses after we take a shit, why should they pay for us to go to University. The pay for cegep, and I know a lot of people who have taken 4 years to do SOCIAL SCIENCE (at Abbott). They sit around and do dick all because they don't have to pay for it, the government does (minus the $120 administrative charge). Maybe if these people were forced to learn by paying their own way, they wouldn't waste government money. Maybe they would actually learn to work if they had to pay for thier education. Maybe they would stop being irresponsible fuck-tards that cost the Governement probably the equivalent of what they are taking away.

God help the poor bastard that stands in my way on Friday. I will not only abuse them mentally untill they cry, but they can also meet Mr. Bat....Mr. Bat watches my back and doesn't take shit from anyone. The demonstration on Sherbrooke Street this afternoon. I walk out of Burnside Hall and all I smell is WEED. Like fuck you're demonstrating, this is just an excuse to skip class, get high, try and ebat up a cop, and act like a giant fuckhead all afternoon. It also seemed to be an excuse to wave a million and a half Quebec flags. This twitched a nerve in my Canadian body....I guess being a Quebecer also means that you have to demonstrate and smoke up because took away what you thought your "right" was.....do all Quebecers act like spoiled brats......"OOOOOO, someone else pay for me, wah wah wah". I'm not anti-Quebecer, but I consider myself CANADIAN. I live in Canada so I'm a Canadian and I compare myself to other Canadians. I'm not a Quebecer who thinks that they are above everybody else in the country and deserves so much more than every other tax paying citizen and family.

FUCK THIS STRIKE. Do you really think the Government cares about about what maybe 100,000 students say? Nope, because the Government already has enough votes. This isn't some militaristic country where we can go and have a Coup. It's a Democracy, we voted this Government in, so deal with it.

Another interesting sidenote....don't you see that the ones striking are mainly French Quebecers.....I wonder why International students and anglophone students aren't raising shit....Maybe we're dumb or something!!!

See everyone Friday, IN FUCKING CLASS,

A "dumb" Canadian

Private School Assholes.....be nice and die

2005-03-13T19:29:00.000-05:00

Welcome One and All,

Another weekend has passed by, and like every other weekend, it's ending too damn early. I'm not looking forward to sitting through Chevrettes lecture on "Stupid Shit that I don't Care About" tomorrow morning....let's up I can find caffeine and take it in an IV so I can stay awake. Another midterm this week...which just makes me angry. Give me one crazy period with everything....not this "I'm going to give an exam 3 weeks after midterms usually are"......DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL

On a more positive note, I have figured out how perform the perfect crime.....MUAHAHAHAHAHA, not that I would actually do it, but the threat of it is just as amazing and thought provoking.

I had a very unfortunate encounter this weekend with a bus....Those new buses that are a perpetual ramp. The seats are too fucking clsoe together, and as a result, I now have 2 fucking bruises on my knees...they'l go away tongiht but show up again after squishing into those damn seats at the Leacock Auditorium. Another thing annoying about the bus during weird hours, people make to much noise! I have my CD player on and I can still hear some dumb, ugly 15 year old girls talking and laughing and screaming in this high pitched fucking voice....SHUT UP, YOU PEOPLE MUST DIE. It's almost as annoying as having to take the bus home with 3 bus loads of 14 year old private school jackasses. They fit 3 busloads of them onto 1 bus.....I ran into one cause he was too short and I didn't see him....to bad I didn't hurt the fucker. These are the kids that start throwing random shit, and innocent people like me and a 50 year old woman get caught in the crossfire......FUCK OFF, GROW UP YOU SHITHEADS. I just want to take them buy their ties and strangle them a bit, then kick them in the ass and throw them out of the window of the bus. Next time I have the oppurtunity, I will open a can of "WHOOP ASS" on them......FEAR ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There are too many people who I should smite, so I won't make a list.but yes Mel, you're still on the list!
And whoever that prick is that keeps posting shit on the stats board, I will find your ass and kick the living crap out of you...people have classes to go to, and Axel only reads things out of the book and does problems....it's the same thing as the text book........if you really get annoyed, why don't you stand in front of the class and voice your feelings? I'll tell you why. Because there's a shit load of people who have no problem kicking the shit out of you repeatedly......at least then you would have some respect instead of hiding behind an anonymous name on a WebCT discussion board.......FUCKING EH!!!!!!!!

Later Boys and Girls, all this anger has made me want to go chop would and make a harpoon,

NICK

HOLY SHIT

2005-03-07T21:30:00.000-05:00

Yeast can be Gay....you're right JD......Everyone sitting behind me in stats, you are all fucking dumb! Yeast can be gay, you are all wrong...MUAHAHAHAHAHA.

Oh yeah, SHUT THE FUCK UP NEXT TIME, I'M TRYING TO CONCENTRATE ON THE TOUGHNESS THAT IS STATS

That felt good....very good
Is it ranting time? I believe it is.

Topic #1: Forks! Forks are fucking dumb. Sure, tehy stab things, so does a knife. Also, a knife is sharper so it would hurt more, thus making the fork useless. If the fork characteristic is incorporated into a spoon and a spork is formed, that's ok. If you have the option of fork or no fork, for FUCKS SAKE PEOPLE, REVERT BACK TO YOUR CAVEMAN (or cavewoman) INSTINCTS....FUCK FORKS

Topic #2:: Curling. I love curling, it's one of the greatest sports ever. What other sport can you play untill you are 100 fucking years old and drunk off your walker? The whole point of curling is to go out and throw shit at other shit and get drunk...sounds like a kick ass sport to me, SO STOP BASHING IT

Topic #3: Carpet. Most carpets are ugly. WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING? Brown Shag carpets? NO WONDER YOUR KIDS ARE DUMB, YOU WERE ON FUCKING CRACK

Topic #4: Yeast. Of coursse they are gay...or at least they can be you fucktards

Topic #5: Dr. Phil. What the fuck does he know? He's not a doctor and he has no hair, besides that fucking creepy moustache....makes him look like a sexual predator.....GET A REAL JOB YOU ASSHOLE

Topic #6: This computer chair. My ass is getting fucking sore....FUCK YOU CHAIR COMPANY!, I'll be American and sue your ass for 15 fucking trillion dollars when I get a hemaroid...if some dumb bastard can sue MacDonalds for making tehm fat, WATCH YOUR FUCKING BACK YOU ASSHOLE CORPORATION

That's all I got for now....

Purveyor of All Useful Literature on the so-called "internet"

Let's Hope this is Understandable

2005-03-07T16:40:00.000-05:00

Hello Loyal Readers,

There is nothing of huge interest in my life that has been going on, so I won't talk about it. Instead, I may actually try writing some crazy thought provoking words, in hopes that you will sit back and think about the world around you and your perception of it all.

I would like to talk about truth. It seems that this is a pretty cut and dried thing. I wonder where this concept of truth originated however. To be proved that something exists, the contrary must also be proven. Therefore, where did the first lie originate? As far back as I can remember, my parents told me not to lie and to be truthful instead. It is hard to live to these standards each and every day. There are always little 'white lies' that are spoken, and other times where the truth is hidden to protect someone's feelings.

But how can truth be manifested into something tangible? The truth cannot simply be spoken words that the listener belives to be "true". Nor can the truth be simply an action that one does. You can tell the truth, but at the very same time, the truth is no words. Somehow, the truth must exist as a spoken manifestation and as a physical action.

The one thing that I find interesting however, is that every society and every person has the same personal definiton of truth. It is not the same scenario as the question "What is Good?"...this problem takes into account many more variables and socio-economic situations. What can be good for one person is different than someone else, but the truth is the same. Truth and my beloved bacteria share a common property: they are both ubiquitous.

The truth is always around us. It governs our actions and our motives. To be fearful of the truth is to be fearful of life. One cannot co-exist without the other. If truth by itself existed, life would not and vice versa. Think about it.

This is the first non-anger oriented post....maybe I didn't get all of my thoughts across clear enough...but it was a first attempt and I promise that they will get better with time!!!

No shout-outs today!

Pensive Boy

The Truth Is No Words

2005-03-04T14:51:00.000-05:00

Please enjoy the title of this post. It is a phrase that I have been thinking about for a long time now, and it has many different interpretations. When I have more time this weekend, I will write more on this particular phrase.

Midterm season is now over....finally! I have survived better than I thought...which is always a welcome change. I now get to sit back and relax for a weekend or so, before I start studying for dirty, dirty finals.

There will be no evil rantings today. It was Jasmina's idea to have a "happy day" where people don't complain and whine about things. Consider that done...for today. I will bitch on the weekend, so look back for a new post later.

Time to focus on positives. Mark Dawson was in town for a few days...he seemed to have found his way back out of the great wilderness that is Chicoutimi. We had a great time bowling (with Alex) and we later went and chilled and talked over some insane Devil's Coffee....how things have changed from high school! Actually, we have stayed the same, it's everyone else that has become crazy! It has been strange to hear that people from high school are getting married! I guess we really are starting to get old! It's so odd......I don't like this aging thing! I guess this means I'm getting closer and closer to surgery! YAY!

Anyways....time for random inside jokes paragraph: Maryse, we still have many stories to tell!, Sean- if only I had a camera today....the pictures I could've had! Jasmina- happy day is working!!!! Alison, one day we will sit down and eat an entire pot of soup, Kristelle- NO MORE SNICKERING...i know what you were thinking (you're not wrong), Emilie....WHERE ARE YOU? ARE YOU STILL ALIVE???? Kim- thanks for taking the smelly one for the day! I can breathe again!!! JD- St. Patrick's Day is coming....do you know where your belt buckle is????

If I missed someone....too bad! Deal with it because I don't care right now....SORRY, I WILL BE NICE!!!
I'm setting up a nice evil rant this weekend, take it easy everyone! Oh yeah, Sean, YOU CAN'T STEAL MY THUNDER.......MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Peace Out

Everyone's favorite NICK

Fuck Titles...I don't need one because Society deems it necessary

2005-02-25T14:14:00.000-05:00

Greeting Everyone,

I have come back to entertain you all for a short period of time! Study break is almost over, and I actually had to study. I am now very angry with anything having to do with glucose or it's breakdown.....DAMN YOU PROF. BROWN. This is probably the most boring shit to ever have a class on. It was bad enough in CEGEP, it's even worse now.

This week was exciting for two mutually exclusize events. First, Nick has gotten a new job! A bid farewell to the Royal St. Lawrence Yacht Club, and I am now a part of the staff for the Beaconsfield Golf Club. It has better pay and is closer to home...and I get to do more exciting work. Thanks to the (most of) Staff from the Royal....I had a great time and I may still show up from time to time. The second exciting event was The Music concert on Thursday. It started with a very mediocore first openers (Morningwood), but picked up with an awsome prog-rock set by British band Kasabian....another CD for me to pick up now! Headlining the show was The Music and they delivered. Solid rock tunes kept the crowd, and me, dancing all night. One of the highlights was having each member of the band playing some sort of drum at the same time at the end of one of a song.....it was pretty amazing!!!

This week also iincluded Kim's shoulder surgery, which is probably going on right now! You'll probably read this later, but I told you everything would be allright! GET BETTER SOON!!!!!!

I realize I have not been swearing as much as I usually do, I guess I'm just not angry right now. This weekend promises to be exciting: concert with Tara and her groupies on Saturday and studying on Sunday......actually, studying sucks some serious ass! I guess the reason Nick is so happy is because all of the people that have been pissing me off and doing dumb shit have finally been leaving me alone!!! Things can be so much better when you aren't bothered by some dumb fucks that you don't give a shit about!!!!

It's kinda sad, but I feel liek going back to school.... I miss too many people.....yes, I'm being nice and emotional! I miss the crazy antics during the morning Bio classes....it keeps me entertained and give me subject matter to write about

I think i may have to abandon the plan (Sean and company)....something seems a bit off!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today's Song of the Day: "Truth is No Words" by The Music
Today's Person to Die: Those people from The Music concert who didn't dance, or move, or bob their heads....WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE????? LABOTOMY GONE WRONG???? W-H-A-T T-H-E F-U-C-K

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......that feels better!!!!

Rock on one and all......good luck studying for BIOL 201 if you're in it, if not, you're a lucky bastard that I will hurt later

Supreme Overlord of the Blog

Look at the White Boy Dance

2005-02-21T14:05:00.000-05:00

"Study Break" has started and all I've been studying is how my ass feels after sitting down for awhile!

I LOVE DOING NOTHING

The weekend that has just finished was amazing. Filled with lots of good friends, good food and of course, good drink. I will not recount all of the details of the weekend, but here is a quick overview:

Friday- met up with some people from school (Alison, Nat, Sean, Emilie), had some diner. I then went to meet up with another friend, Tara. We talked and danced with some of her crazy chemistry friends....GOOD TIMES

Saturday- it was Mir's birthday, so we proceeded to go out bowling, where much hilarity insued. We then went out for a very nice diner....kick-ass food!!! I then stopped off for a pint of beer at a watering hole, before heading home for some much needed rest........GOOD TIMES

Sunday- Jasmina's birthday diner at a nice little restaurant by the Old Port. Again, great company, amazing food, some good wine!.....GOOD TIMES again.

I know everyone is expecting some kind of rant from me, but the truth is, I really am so pissed off right now that I don't want to regret things I say...not that I do anyways. All I can say is why don't people mind their own business? Why does everyone have to be concerned about what I do, who I talk to? If those particular people are reading this, JUST LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE. I don't talk shit about you, I stay out of your business, so do the same for me. Maybe it's all this bullshit reality TV is making people into a bunch of voyeurs, that they have to poke and prod people's personal lives. There's an old saying that says "You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours". I would like to amend this saying to the following: "You try and scratch my back, or touch me or anything, I will kick the crap outta you". But then again, I'm a non-violent person, so this is more of an empty threat.

In other random news, I got to meet a psychic on the bus! He seemed pretty bad since he didn't give me my future, but instead talked about he was at some weird love/peace conference thing....seemed odd, but he was a nice chap.

This just in: FUCK GENETICS. That midterm is horseshit........FUCK OFF JD

Today's song of the day is "Pockets" by Powderfinger
Todays list of people who must die: George W. Bush, that guy called Jim, the person who wrote that genetics midterm, JD, and anyone with the name Gertrude......I HATE THAT NAME

Have a good study break, and in the words of AC/DC, "Have a drink on me"

Still Alive

2005-02-14T23:47:00.000-05:00

The week from Hell has come and gone, and I must thank Satan for his hospitality. It wasn't the greatest week, but it's now over.

I must say that the Keane concert was fantastic. Actually, for me the show-stopper were The Zutons who were just amazing, along with the Redwalls who put on a very very good show. You see, this music is a lot better then a lot of crap that is out there, like Avril Lavigne, Simple Plan and Ashlee Simpson (sorry Elisa). The Zutons can actually play their instruments quite well, and they have many clever arrangements with saxophonist Abi Harding (the hot one of the group). It's so nice and refreshing to see clever music for once. Enough of this recycled garbage crap.

And now for the rant....
Valentine's Day. Possibly the stupidest excuse for a holiday ever. Who the fuck came up with this? and don't give me that bullshit story with the priest St. Valentine falling in love with some Medieval chick.....this was one fucked up priest! What happened to not trying to get women into the sack? Isn't that what a priest was/is supposed to do??? Why specifically February 14th.....why is this the only day that people should be "showered with love"? Maybe I'm just very naive, but shouldn't this happen all the time? Fucking society and their dumb shit. Maybe I'm just bitter from single life or something, but this shit really gets to me. What if this is a holiday I choose not to endorse? Why, then whoever I am dating at the time will probably castrate me because society deems it necessary to buy flowers and candy and other random crap.....FUCKING CAPITALIST CRAP. I choose to not observe this day. Why don't people make a big deal about Groundhog Day as they do Valentine's Day. I would rather see a cute little groundhog "see his shadow" (which is kinda difficult with all the flash bulbs going off) then watch some stupid chick flick crap fantasies about what a man should be and do. FUCK IT ALL! Belated Groundhog Day to one and all!!!!!!!
P.S. Hearts are one of the tackiest symbols ever.....what the fuck! Fuck Cupid, why does he shoot people in the ass...people like that belong in jail. He should stop playing God by messin' with people's emotions, find some pants, and get a real job....my Valentine's mascot would be a giant squid. Why? Why the fuck use Cupid? All this mythology bullshit is just that: BULLSHIT. Something tells me that Hercules and Zeus and the rest of the pricks didn't really exist.

Onto more pressing matters, my shoulder is hurting like a biatch!
A list of people that must die....soon, as to make the world a better place: Avril Lavigne, all the fucks from Simple Plan, Sum 41, Maroon 5, Incubus (sorry Kristelle), John Mayer, Bob Goodenow, Gary Bettman, Richard M. Nixon (he's already dead but I don't care), the Perv aka Wacko Jacko and any stupid manufacturer of Valentine's Day hearts or heart-shaped accesories......BURN IN HELL YOU SONS OF BITCHES

I'm in a good mood today!!!Well, except for all the stupid crap I have to put up with.......some people are quite dumb and unobservant...and I don't really want to put up with bullcrap tonight (Kristelle knows what I'm talking about)....it boggles the mind to see such ignorance of facts...........I really need to smite some people!!!!

In other news,: the plan is in motion....according to Sean and Ali anyways, woman #467, Kristelle, wants my baby, Tara is sick as a duck, but is gonna come to a decison soon and then go celebrate with Nick, Elisa looks like she's gonna kill something, but won't because she can't, Kim is giving me attitude that I don't deserve.......WHY SO MEAN EH???? If Patrick is reading this by any chance, stop now!!!! Oh yeah, Justin, shut the fuck up...I can't concentrate on stats...it's too fucking hard you douche!

If I left some of you out, I'm sorry! Yes, Nick is actually being nice and apologizing.

Song of the Day: "Zuton Fever" by the Zutons

If you don't like it, FUCK OFF, YOU WOULDN'T KNOW GOOD MUSIC IF IT CAME AND FONDLED YOUR BUTTOCKS.

From all of us here in Nick's head,
Good night and good hunting (figuratively, hunting is kinda dumb)

Genetics=WHORE

2005-02-09T00:10:00.000-05:00

Yes, this is a scientifically tested formula.

Genetics is the most evil thing ever thought of....EVER. If Monk Mendel was alive today, I would surely kick him in the groin!!!! Is there anything more annoying than looking at stupid flies and dumb ass pea plants and seeing "how their progeny looks". I say, FUCK the progeny. Who cares if they have red flowers,or pink, or white....JUST ENJOY THE DAMN PRETTY COLOURS. (Notice "colour" is spelt with a "u" you dumb American jackasses....BURN)

See, genetics brings out the bad in everyone. It is just so damn boring...with so many exceptions that I'm losing my mind. If I take a fruit fly with brown eyes and short legs and I mate it with another fruit fly with red eyes and ginormous legs, I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK WHAT THEIR "PROGENY" LOOK LIKE.....it's jsut a god-damn fruit fly that is made for our own use....it has no use....who really cares if scientists can isolate a gene for eye colour...does it really make a difference? NO. Medical genetics is different...at least possible treatments/cures can be found for differet ailments, but who cares about fucking plants? Why don't we educate a large portion of the student population on HIV in order to have many minds thinking of a vaccine? Yes, I see the impracticality of this also......SHUT UP. Genetics is like a vacuum cleaner, the NFL, or pop music...IT JUST SUCKS ASS.

How the fuck can Avril Lavigne get nominated for songwriter of the year at the Junos? She doesn't write all of her own material. Gord Downie should go slap the biatch...he's a real songwriter...even though his lyrics are cracked out!!!!!!! Kudos to The Trews for their single of the year nomination, for "Not Ready To Go"....they should win it, but some shitty ass pop song is going to win. On that note, Simple Plan can lick my nut sack....they suck and should be put down like the dogs they are.

When I have more time, I will surely complain more about the shitty condition that most music is in.....POP MUSIC SHOULD DIE

Now...back to studying .......(fucking mendel....one day I'll kick your stupid monk ass........you fuck-tard)

Random Crap (part 1 of ???)

2005-02-05T01:32:00.000-05:00

Nick is back....NO, I'm not gonna start to do some bullshit Eminem paradoy because what's the point of doing a parody of a parody....did anyone ever do that to Weird Al..I THINK NOT

Time for another rant of some sort. I'm here, with my glass of Midori...relaxin' and letting the anger and the words come to me. Today's annoying bunch of people: Lazy Jackasses

I know many of you are thinking, "NIck, you're a lazy jackass!". True, I may be lazy and a jack ass...but at least I do it with style. There are some people who just make you cringe because they are so lazy. It's like having people on a competitive sports team who refuse to do work and practice...then get angry when you yell at them. Also, there are the people that you aer forced to climb over when you are trying to get to a seat in the Leacock Auditorium (McGill University for those who don't know). The reason that people don't move, because they are lazy sons of bitches. I can be lazy, but I still contribute to society via this blog and work and volunteering, but some people do piss all and sit on their asses all day. WHERE IS THE MOTIVATION. I don't know anyone who sits around like that, I'm just generalizing here. I guess it is true that we are the "Lazy Generation". It is a sad fact that people expect everything to be delivered to them without having to work for it. I have been guilty of this many times. But I learnt my lesson and it happens less frequently to me now...I actually have self-sufficiance. To quote the great rock band Sloan, "I hate my generation". (At least most...those who I like, you know who you are!!!)

I blame all of this laziness on MTV. Not because they are gratuitous or have lots of ads, but because they play lots of crappy music. Britney Spears, P.Diddy, 50 Cent and all the like is really CRAP. People have heard so much of it that they have become hypnotized into thinking it's good, and as a direct result have become lazy. Don't ask how, it's a very complicated scientific correlation. However, people who listen to good music (anything not rap or pop) seem to not have this "laziness" condition. I guess it is fair to say that the "bad music taste" gene and the "laziness" gene are on the same chromosome.

Sorry about that last comment!!!!!! I have been studying lots of BIOL 202 (Basic Genetics) and sometimes things just pop out.....no, not like a weasel, but I like a HUGE FUCKING POTATO BEING PULLED FROM IT'S EARTHY HOME.......I will try and calm the anger...fucking shrinks.

In the end, everything will be ok. At the end you are by yourself and if and when you die, as long as you are happy with yourself everything will be fine. "Everything dies alone"- from the movie Donnie Darko. If lazy jackasses are pissing you off, kick their ass, stop being lazy yourself and put a kick-ass rock cd (mp3's suck you pirating bastards) into your machine and relax and let the riffs take you to a nice sunny beach...unless you're Canadaian then your happy place better be a playoff hockey game that involves the Toronto Maple Leafs and/or Boston Bruins getting their asses handed to them by another team....preferably a Canadaian team...excluding the Senators; they can lick my ass

My glass is empty, so Nick is gone.

Update

2005-02-02T22:22:00.000-05:00

Nick has returned from basketball with only minor injuries: blister on toe, sore shoulder, sore ankle and sore back!

It looks like things are finally getting better....TAKE THAT ALL YOU NAY-SAYERS

Nick is tired......the voices in my head are really getting to me tonight....must find a banana....apparently Potassium is good for you or some shit like that!

Cheerio

Let it begin...

2005-02-02T18:17:00.000-05:00

Why do I have this new foudn blog? I have no freaking clue. This is where my randomness and bitching will take place, in order to save people from my occasional angry outburst (when i say occasional i mean often).
Today was yet another day of insanity...dumb school (genetics can kiss my ass), good chats with people (you know who you are) and some gut wrenching pain (ie, stupid tennis hurting my stupid shoulder). But will I place basketball tonight and hurt myself more??? You damn well better believe it! I bet no gonna read this, so i guess this is also a cheap form of therapy!!! Take that you you dumb shrinks!!!! Get a real job!!!! (sorry to all of you who want to become psychiatrists!!!)

In other news today, the winter is finally finished....much to my chagrin. I saw multiple people in shorts today downtown...the season of ugly legs is upon us!!! You know, those people who wear shorts, but have very ugly un-shapely legs!!! the kind that just make you cringe and want to beat them with a stick? No??? I guess i'm the only one!!!

Today's song of the day is "Yeah" by the Golden Dogs....not that fucking shitty ass Usher song.....i hope pop music dies along with rap....damn crap.

That is about it for now.....I will get angry about something later and you damn well know that i will tell you all about it!!!